Mathilde (25) and Amélie (27) are volunteers for Ton Plan à Toi, an initiative for relationship and sexuality education launched by IPPF's French Member Association, Mouvement Francais Pour Le Planning Familial. Ton Plan à Toi was set up in February 2018 to provide people living in the French region of Nouvelle-Aquitaine (6 million of them!) with skills and information that would enable them to have happy and healthy relationships and lives. To do this, volunteers at Ton Plan à Toi conduct workshops in schools, hold trainings with professionals, and answer young people’s questions on relationships and sexuality using the chat function of the Ton Plan à Toi website. Mathilde focuses on delivering workshops in schools while Amélie spends her time answering young people’s questions online. See what they had to say about their experiences below. Could you tell me a bit about why relationship and sexuality education is important for you? M: For me, education is the key to everything. When I started volunteering at Le Planning Familial I realised if I had this information in my youth, my life would have been completely different. But I didn't have information – about STIs, contraception or just consent and everything relating, like sexuality. So I thought: this is the key to end all the issues that women and girls face. A:  The goal of education for me is to establish equality between people coming from different origins, and sexuality education does this because there are environments where people don’t talk about it at all and others where they are more open –  sexuality education provides a basis to everyone. When you were growing up did you have relationship and sexuality education?  M: With the sexuality education I had access to there was a kind of hierarchy. We were all sitting while the teacher was standing in front of us and just sharing information – we didn't use our critical thinking or had our beliefs or misconceptions challenged. So that's what we're trying to do now, to challenge young people’s beliefs and stereotypes. And when they respond, we don't say 'no that's wrong' we say 'okay, why do you think that?' A: No, in my family we talked about it pretty openly, but in school it wasn’t the case. I learned about the reproductive system, but that’s not sexuality education.  Can you tell me a bit about how you got involved in Le Planning? What was your motivation?  M: When I was living in Ireland, I got involved in the Repeal the 8th campaign and discovered I was an activist for reproductive rights. Then when I came back to my hometown I realised I should get involved in something supporting feminism – it was a few months after the #MeToo movement and I thought what I saw there was amazing, but nobody was listening to us, nothing really happened. So I thought: yes, let's volunteer at Le Planning. A: I had an abortion when I was younger and it was difficult because – well, everything went well, and I was very well looked after, but I didn’t feel good about my decision. And then after doing some reading on it, I noticed that it’s society which has created this image of abortion, and that my choice was okay. So I started with having an abortion, then I became a feminist, and once you become a feminist a lot of things follow from that. Amélie, what would you say are the most commonly asked questions on the Ton Plan à Toi website chat? A: Questions about ‘the first time,’ there are a lot of them. About the fear of the first time. Young people are scared because there are a lot of expectations, a lot of anxieties – but it’s not as hard as they fear. So it’s about de-dramatising what it will be like and emphasizing the importance of consent. Mathilde, when you hold workshops at school, are there subjects that you find more difficult to address than others?  M: I think it really depends on the subject, but things about the body are common – body hair, periods, that's difficult. Also porn comes up a lot. Like, ‘is it normal to say that, is it normal to do that?’ They are really worried.  Since you started volunteering at Ton Plan à Toi, has there been any particular moment when you had the sense that you were doing something important? M: We had a young person who was saying homophobic things during our session so we used our techniques to not say 'no, this is so wrong ' but 'why do you think that?' At the end of the session we asked them how they felt. And he said 'I'm so lost, I don't know what to think anymore.' I felt that this was the purpose of relationship and sexuality education. We don't want them to go out thinking 'I’m totally different,’ but to challenge themselves and question their beliefs that are rooted in harmful stereotypes. A: On the chat, we have conversations about violence – the chat allows people to speak to someone, people who otherwise wouldn't have this possibility. These are difficult situations, but I’m happy that the chat allows these people to at least find somebody who they can speak with.   Interview conducted by Eimear Sparks, IPPF EN

We talked with Feđa Mehmedović, Programme Leader at Association XY (IPPF’s Member Association in Bosnia and Herzegovina) about his experiences providing and advocating for relationship and sexuality education in his country.   Could you talk to me about the context for relationship and sexuality education in Bosnia & Herzegovina?  Bosnia & Herzegovina is divided into two entities - we have the Federation of Bosnia & Herzegovina and the entity of the Republika Srpska. It's quite a traditional country, with three key religious groups (Catholics, Muslims, Orthodox) that are each involved in the politics of the country. Almost two decades ago, just after the war, the Minister of Education introduced religious classes in primary and high schools. But parents raised their voices and wanted to have an alternative. The Ministry introduced a second subject, which was also a religious one, and then parents raised their voices again. So the Ministry agreed that it needed to introduce a third subject – this was the entry point for healthy lifestyles, the first time relationship and sexuality education entered formal education. So the political context in Bosnia & Herzegovina is influenced by religious groups, can you talk about your experiences working with these groups to advance relationship and sexuality education? We wanted to introduce relationship and sexuality education in religious communities, but when we tried to collaborate it was impossible. We were blacklisted as an NGO that was promoting sexual and reproductive health and rights because they link these rights to LGBT groups, which they perceive as harmful to society. But we then identified two people from Islamic religious communities who are Imams, and who are really open-minded. I have found out that we - all of us - have a lot of prejudice from both sides. Religious communities found that NGOs avoid collaboration with them. We are talking offensively from both sides, and we don’t provide enough space where we can meet each other and work together. Did you receive relationship and sexuality education when you were growing up? No. No it was a horrible experience in primary and secondary school because not even puberty was covered – we talked only about the physical change; that we will get hair, that the voice will change, and that was it. I had a stressful puberty because I had problems understanding myself. I asked for almost one year, every day – ‘am I normal? am I different?’ And I didn't have anyone to respond or to provide me with answers to these questions. Puberty for young people is so important because it's not about growing hair – it's about you, it’s about your self-image, social norms, gender norms, gender identity, pleasure, relationships – healthy relationships, unhealthy relationships, having sex. It's about everything. There are so many questions and you have to find answers to these questions. But in a society like ours parents are not open to talking about it – they didn't receive support to build the capacity to talk about it. And that's why education on puberty is something we are fighting for. What motivated you to become a champion for sexuality education? When I was growing up, I had a lot of prejudice towards the LGBTQI population. I didn't understand them, but my attitudes weren’t driven by information or personal experience. It's like when you rent an attitude from someone else – you take it from someone else, you don't have a critical understanding of it or know why you believe something like that. Then, at the end of high school, I became a peer educator and started teaching people and having contact with people who were gay or lesbian, and I started understanding that they are completely the same as I am. I found out that I can say sorry, in a different way - by working on relationship and sexuality education. And it became my mission. If you could imagine the perfect future for relationship and sexuality education in Bosnia and Herzegovina, what would it look like? That every young person can get information relevant for their health, for themselves. Information not only from a health perspective, but from a personal perspective – so that they can express themselves. Every person is unique, different, there is no reason for all of us to be the same. All bodies are beautiful and all people are beautiful, sometimes we just don't understand each other.    Interview conducted by Eimear Sparks, IPPF EN

Sonja Ghaderi is Project Manager of 'Curious: Sex and Relationships for young newcomers,’ a relationship and sexuality education programme for young migrants in Sweden which is led by IPPF’s Swedish Member Association, RFSU. Could you give me a little background to the work RFSU is doing to provide relationship and sexuality education for young newcomers in Sweden? Sexual and reproductive health is a part of most people's lives. But when you come to a new country you might not get the information you need because issues of sexual and reproductive health and rights (SRHR) aren’t talked about or you can’t access the information in a language you understand. Migrants come from a lot of different contexts so it's a very diverse group, but what we have seen is that you cannot wait. You cannot wait for information on sexual and reproductive health. So, in 2011, one of our local entities, RFSU Gothenburg developed materials to be able to conduct sexuality education in basic Swedish. The information that you get is practically the same as sexuality education at school only that some parts are more basic and it was made more accessible with pictures and by using simple language used to raise literacy on body parts and so on. We then have peer educators (aged 20 – 30) who have been trained on how to use the materials – they learn how to express themselves in easier Swedish and to understand needs that are prevalent among migrants, and how experiences of racism can have a negative impact on SRHR. An anti-racist perspective permeates everything we do. How do you incorporate anti-racism into relationship and sexuality education? We build the capacity of our peers that have not had the experience of migrating to Sweden and ask them to reflect on questions like: What is racism? How is it expressed in society today? How are exotification ('exotification' sexualizes and objectifies people according to harmful and stereotyped ideas about race) and sexualisation connected to racism? We also talk about norms on 'whiteness', like how there is a norm that categorizes people according to the colour of our skin and how this informs our daily interactions. Because unfortunately, many of the youth that come to Sweden experience this and it's something they have to struggle with everyday. Are all of your sessions done in Swedish? Up until 2016 we mainly had activities in basic Swedish, but we noticed a need for translated materials for people working in healthcare services. So we gathered reference groups to see what support migrants would need to be able to learn about SRHR and we then made twelve movies in 14 different languages which care providers now use to provide information when sitting with a patient, student or meeting migrants in other contexts. So if your patient lacks basic information on menstruation, pregnancy, lust and pleasure, any theme that these movies have, you can watch them together and stop if the person has questions on a certain subject. How important is it for migrants to be able to get information on sexuality and relationships in their own language? I think you need the knowledge in your own language because – I mean even now I have difficulties expressing myself in English sometimes, even though I consider myself fluent. Imagine then you come to a new country, how many years would it take for you to learn a new language? So yes, you need translated information on SRHR, because in your mother tongue it goes right into your heart. Also, you shouldn’t need to learn Swedish to access important information, otherwise there is a risk that the rights that everyone have are not enjoyed by persons who have recently come to Sweden or have been here without knowing Swedish. Have you noticed whether there are particular questions that young newcomers ask in your sexuality education sessions? Practically everyone is excited and thankful to have the opportunity to talk about issues around sexuality, norms, relationships, as it might be the first time for many of them. One of the things we talk about is masturbation, because many have heard that it is dangerous and that you should not engage in it. So we talk about that. Another common question is ‘how can I find someone to date?’ Or ‘I want to flirt with someone, how do I do it?’. Do you think it’s important to take a sex-positive approach to sexuality education? Yes! Sex can be so many enjoyable things and so many difficult things, so when we talk to youth and adults we try to encompass everything. For us the lust perspective is very important because most people are curious and think of sex as something exciting and thrilling. With that as a starting point, you can also talk about the difficult aspects. One final question – has there been a particular moment in your work when you felt that you were doing something important? Recently, I was training teachers that work with newly arrived youth and we had a session on racism and how exotification and racism affect discussions of sexuality. Afterwards some of them said they were now reflecting on how they interact and that they might change the way they talk a bit. It’s when you notice that there's an 'aha' moment – that they perhaps reflect on their own privilege and what they need to do to make the world more equal.   Interview conducted by Eimear Sparks, IPPF EN

Today the Polish Parliament deliberates a bill that will endanger young people in Poland, threatening their emotional, physical and social wellbeing by censoring information on sexual and reproductive health and prevention of sexual violence. It is no surprise that the author of this morally bankrupt initiative is the fundamentalist organisation Ordo Iuris, as it will particularly hurt and harm young women and girls, consistently their target of attack. The promoters of this medieval bill want to censor and punish those who care for children’s health and women’s safety. They would see 3-year prison sentences imposed on anyone who works to protect young people through educating them about healthy relationships, intimate life and prevention of violence.     This is an utterly irresponsible proposal in a digital era where it is not possible to control what information young people see and how they interpret it. Children as young as nine are getting their first information on intimate relations from internet pornography. Violence against women and girls is endemic all over the world; in Poland 4.5 million women experience psychological violence at the hands of their current partners or husbands; and 2 million women experience physical or sexual violence.  Parents everywhere want to protect their children as they grow into adulthood and ensure they have happy and healthy lives. In this they urgently need to be supported by the wider community, including schools. Various studies demonstrate that education addressing equality between men and women and focusing on consent can reduce intimate partner violence. Yet, just when such support is most needed, this bill seeks to rip the rug from under the feet of Polish parents and enable the state to abdicate its responsibility to protect the health and safety of its citizens, particularly women and young people. The intention of the bill closely mirrors a Russian law from 2012 that has forbidden all information on sexuality education, making it impossible for teachers to help reduce teenage pregnancies and rates of HIV. This would be a tragic example for Poland to follow. Irene Donadio, Senior Lead for Partnerships and Strategy at IPPF European Network, said:   “The ideologically driven progenitors of this punitive bill clearly don’t care at all about the real challenges that parents, children and society face. The times we live in are full of new dangers, and governments should be protecting and supporting young people to develop the skills needed for healthy intimacy throughout their lives, helping to stop an epidemic of violence directed at women. It sends a shiver down my spine that there are people trying instead to drive girls and boys back into a world of ignorance and fear. It is also revealing that an initiative ostensibly intended to prevent paedophilia does not propose any measure that would tackle violence such as that perpetrated by the Catholic Church in Poland’s biggest child sexual abuse scandal. IPPF EN urges the Polish Parliament to stand up for children’s health and wellbeing instead of ripping away essential protections." *** For more information, contact [email protected], +32 (0)491 719 390

IPPF EN is fighting with and for young people so that they have the chance to develop the life skills needed to foster healthier and safer relationships, based on equality and respect. Over the past few decades we have seen increased support for relationship and sexuality education with several countries in Europe and Central Asia setting an ambitious tone. Nonetheless, access to relationship and sexuality education varies widely across countries, as many governments continue to deprive young people of crucial life skills that would enable them to have happy and healthy relationships and lives. At IPPF EN, we believe that the quality of someone’s sexuality education should not be reduced to a geographical lottery. Sexist and coercive movements are spreading misinformation about relationship and sexuality education. These movements oppose efforts to break down harmful and rigid gender norms around masculinity and femininity. They attack education that promotes awareness and respect for gender identity, sexual orientation, sexual pleasure and sexual rights. In this context, IPPF Member Associations are working tirelessly to enable young people to develop knowledge and life skills that support their health and well-being - through trainings for educators, the implementation of innovative programmes outside school settings, and advocacy for mandatory relationship and sexuality education. To learn more about the work done in different countries on ensuring young people access relationship and sexuality education, read our three blog series.

While sitting in a session on sexuality education at the Armando Emilio Guebuza school in Maputo we noticed how openly the students were talking about topics that are taboo in other spaces. Their teacher, Vasco Nhamussa, said that “students want to talk about these topics, they are no longer taboo. The students are interested, and they seem to enjoy the conversations.” Vasco is one of the teachers that works closely with AMODEFA to run together information sessions on sex and relationship education. 4000 students attend Guebuza school and benefit from sex and relationships education. In grades 6 and 7 they are taught basic things, but from grade 8 they dive into many topics. Vasco talks with them about contraceptive care, HIV prevention and sexual pleasure – they discuss consent, how to set boundaries, how to avoid being in coercive relationships and how to protect themselves from violence. “We are interested in learning about sexual and reproductive health (SRH) so that we grow up to be informed adults who take the right decisions. We are also here to learn how to protect ourselves from people who would abuse us” said one of his students. “We can lead a better life if we are informed” added another. Sexuality education addresses the need to foster emotional and sexual intelligence and the capacity for healthy, intimate bonding and growth. Vital skills developed through sex and relationships education are particularly important in countries dealing with child marriage and teen pregnancies. Since sex and relationship sessions started, the school has seen reduced numbers of unintended pregnancies – they had five to six pregnancies each year, but the number has now dropped to one or two. “Currently, I am not thinking about having children. After I finish school and get my degree, I can start planning having children” said a 13 years old student. A reduction has also been noted in the prevalence of STIs and HIV infections. The classes are complemented by the fact that AMODEFA (IPPF member) runs a youth-friendly clinic on the premises of the school. Students mainly come to the clinic to better understand the changes happening to their bodies and to receive free contraceptive care. “We don’t want to see young people drop out of schools because of diseases of unintended pregnancies. We would like to have more ‘counselling corners’ in schools to make it as easy as possible for students to learn about SRH” said Arlinds Chaquiose from the Mozambican Ministry of Education. “The benefits are not only limited to the students, but it also helps the community at large. There are people from the community who come as patients to the clinic” said Vasco. Being able to replicate this success in other schools depends almost entirely on donors remaining committed to supporting sexuality and reproductive health and rights. People in Mozambique want access to family planning and want their children to stay in school and lead safe and happy lives.   Main Photo: Young AMODEFA activists running a sexuality education information session at the Armando Emilio Guebuza school in Maputo. The covered topics such as modern contraceptive methods, issues of pleasure and consent. Photo credit: Cosmina Marian/C2030E Article by Cosmina Marian, IPPF EN Read the next blog in our series about family planning in Mozambique.  

Young people are often denied care in societies where sex is taboo and parents can control their children’s access to medical providers. These challenges are amplified in conservative contexts where women and girls are made to feel uncomfortable when talking about contraception. The Tajikistan Family Planning Association (TFPA) has pioneered a phone application - available free of charge - that allows young people to gain crucial knowledge about modern contraception and sexually transmitted infections/HIV and connects them with health care providers. Through its innovative app, TFPA has created a safe space for young people to access stigma-free care, and to explore methods of sexual and reproductive self-care. This app has changed attitudes towards people living with STIs/HIV and inspired young people to have open and honest conversations about sexual and reproductive health care with their peers. "Before using the app, she thought STIs could only be caught by sex workers or people lacking morals, and that something like that could never happen to her or to her close friends. But now she realises that it can happen to anyone, even by accident. Now she tries to understand people who might have an STI." Young person in Tajikistan recounting an interview with a 19-year old woman as part of TFPA’s project

By: Anamaria Suciu, Romania   I am 28 years old and I grew up in Bucharest, the capital city of Romania, an Eastern European country that got rid of communism the year before I was born. My parents’ life was fundamentally different than mine. They lived their younger years in a closed society based on fear, and considered family and hard work to be their core values. Contraception was not available and abortion was criminalised. Relationships quickly turned into marriages and, soon after, into parenthood. Most social gatherings were taking place behind closed doors and, of course, there was no internet. My parents didn’t even have a phone at home until I was about five or so. My life has been different. I was born a few months after the revolution. I am part of the first generation to live in the democratic and capitalist Romania we know now. I was very lucky to have open-minded parents, who quickly adapted to the new realities and embraced them positively. Still, to some extent, my teen years and my transition to adulthood were not so different from theirs. I grew up feeling ashamed and somewhat guilty of my body, receiving too much unwanted attention. From colleagues at schools to strangers on the street, it seemed totally natural for strangers to slap my behind or catcall me. I knew this was not right, but also didn’t realize that it was not my fault. I clearly remember one day, in secondary school, when a classmate lifted my skirt. I immediately complained to our teacher, but the teacher didn’t seem bothered at all and said that it was normal for boys to be curious.   Later, when I started my sex life, I had a feeling everybody on the street could tell. I didn’t feel like I did anything wrong, but still, the idea of my parents finding out was terrifying. We never talked about sex in any other way than something I was supposed to avoid until later. When I went to my first gynecological visit, I was accompanied by my friend’s brother, who knew where to go and who to speak to for a consultation. The second time I went to the gynecologist, I received a treatment that I had to do without my parents knowing, as they would have realized that I had started having sex. Some years after, I had to use emergency contraception, and for a long time, I was afraid it would affect my fertility. Until one day. One lucky day in 2013, I applied as a volunteer for the Society for Contraception on Sexuality and Education and it changed my life. It opened my eyes to the lack of information that young people face and how different things could be. The people I met there (adults!!) were so open to discussing sexuality in a positive way that it took me a while to realize that it was possible to have another attitude towards well-being and self-care. After being trained, I started going to schools to give sexuality education workshops. During my first class, I was so nervous that my heart rate was fast and my feet were weak. I was so sure that nobody would listen to my colleague and me. But I was pleasantly surprised. After a round of laughter, even the most uninterested pupils started paying attention. I continued in the field and was eventually hired to coordinate an entire network of young people working on comprehensive sexuality education at national and regional levels called YSAFE. Today, I still volunteer, now for YouAct, an organization of youth advocates who are doing their best to make sure young people get the attention they deserve when it comes to their sexual and reproductive health and rights. I have met so many passionate young people who think and act the same as I do, and I am hopeful I will see a fundamental change in young people’s access to sexual health information during my lifetime. As a young woman, I believe that comprehensive sexuality education is power - the power to know who you are, to do what you want, and to believe in the future.     You can also find Anamaria's blog on Torchlight Collective and on Say It Forward in English and in Romanian.

Young people from marginalised groups in Eastern Europe and Central Asia are being harmed by high levels of violence, discrimination and stigma, and it is enormously difficult for them to access sexuality education or the sexual and reproductive health (SRH) care they need. ACPD – IPPF’s member in Albania - has put in place networks and training programmes that have enabled hundreds of stigmatised young people to develop knowledge and life skills that support their health and well-being. Young people who are sex workers, are part of the LGBTI community, inject drugs, live in poverty or rural communities, or are Roma, are the most likely to be denied sexuality education and access to non-judgmental sexual and reproductive health care. But ACPD has succeeded where many have failed before in reaching marginalised young people and having a positive impact on their lives.  Through sexuality education, ACPD and its partners have successfully equipped 785 young people with crucial life skills, building their knowledge about sexuality, relationships and safe sex, and strengthening their ability to make decisions, communicate, negotiate and plan for the future. As a result of this work, 500 young people have been cared for through ACPD clinics and/or other care providers in their communities. They have started to visit clinics, for example to seek condoms and counselling and ask to be tested for HIV. They talk about how they have changed their behaviour as a result of sexuality education programmes, and feel empowered to build healthier and safer relationships, based on equality and respect. One young man gave this feedback:   "I'm gay and a sex worker, which makes me feel judged twice over. In everyday life people sometimes call you “abnormal” and there are times when you go to a doctor or to get a HIV test, and they start using embarrassing labels which stop you from going back for care. I was invited to participate in ACPD's comprehensive sexuality education school. I learnt about my sexual rights, my right to access stigma-free services. I learnt about having safe sex and always using a condom. Now I have the courage to ask my clients to use a condom when they don’t want to. Knowing my rights gives me the courage to speak up for non-judgmental and friendly SRH services when I go to a health care centre. This school has improved my physical and mental health, my life in general. Sexuality education can empower us!" ACPD also organised sessions and trainings to empower marginalised young people to educate their peers and to advocate for their rights to sexual and reprodutive health care, for example showing them how to speak for themselves in decision-making spaces. Ensuring that stigmatised young people have a voice is essential to securing better care and support for their needs in the long-term. In an effort to reduce the harm caused by discrimination and violence from people in positions of authority (like the police), ACPD has also counselled stigmatised young people on how to deal with these hard issues.  Marginalised young people can become almost entirely reliant on health care provided by NGOs as they are abandoned by those closest to them, discriminated against by people who have a duty of care, and even vilified in some circles of society. IPPF EN and our partners will continue to ensure free, safe and dignified lives for all, especially those facing the greatest challenges.   More at ACPD - Albanian Center for Population and Development

Recently, the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR) took a major decision in favour of young peoples' right to sexuality education at school on the grounds that this provides them with the skills to protect themselves from sexual violence. This was in response to a case brought forward by a Swiss woman who wanted her child to be exempted from a class where she could ask questions about sexuality and reproductive health. In Switzerland, teachers are encouraged by law to answer questions related to sexuality and reproductive health in kindergarten and primary school. In the case in question, the highest Swiss court decided that it was in the best interest of the child to have access to information that could protect her health. The ECHR came to the same conclusion. The ECHR ruling is a clear recognition of the role that sexuality education plays in the global education of children, in the fight against sexual abuses and in the protection of public health. The Court highlighted that society has a vested interest in very young children receiving well thought-out sexuality education. In addition, it underlined that preparing children to cope with social realities is a core responsibility of public education - a strong argument in support of sexuality education in kindergarten and primary schools. This decision highlights that a lack of knowledge, even from an early age, can expose children to physical, emotional and social harm. It is vital to give young people the means and skills to recognise sexual abuse, lay down boundaries and be aware of the ownership they hold over their bodies. Sexuality education fosters this type of literacy and builds the competences that help protect children from violence, coercion and gender inequity. It also supports them in developing the emotional and social intelligence that they need to build healthy and fulfilling relationships as they grow up. A child’s right to be taught the skills that will prepare him or her for a responsible, safe and healthy life in a free society must clearly take precedence over a far-fetched interpretation of the right to privacy, of freedom of thought, conscience and religion. There is no denying that parents also play, and will continue to play, a vital role in helping their children develop these crucial life skills. But some may be unable or unwilling to do so, and in any case individual families cannot foster these skills in their children’s peers and future partners. This is where society as a whole has a role to play in ensuring no young person is left behind.   By Julie Pernet, from the European Humanist Federation *More information on this milestone decision: European Court of Human Rights, Case A.R. v. Switzerland, December the 19th 2017. ECHR Press release, January 2018